Contemplation!

 

August 2022 Blog

Contemplation: A Haiku

To write or write not –

Seems more than my navel needs

Attention these days.

by Ann Wilmer-Lasky

(8/1/22)

 

That is the question. Searching for an answer this month.

I find I cannot continue as I am – always promising myself to sit down and write the stories, the novels, this blog. I am only consistent with the Haiku I write daily, and that is probably because it’s become such an ingrained habit.

All else is up for contemplation.

I find very little inspiration in life these days for continuing my writing. Even though the act of writing does offer me those few moments of joy in life I so desperately need, I sometimes wonder if I can continue.

I do have a decent backlist  of books to my credit, and I would certainly like more, but I will never match the well over 100 historical romance novels my good friend, neighbor and landlady has produced.

She cranks out a new one every month or so. I would find that exhausting. But even more exhausting is mentally beating myself up because I have not written, because I can’t seem to carve out the time for writing.

Sometimes I wonder how I ever did. I wrote most of my novels while still working a full time job – mostly writing in the evening propped up in bed for an hour or two.

Now, I don’t work , I have all the time in the world and I just can’t seem to find that time.

Or am I just the world’s best (or worst) procrastinator? I guess I’m the best, because I’m so good at it.

So, do I overcome, or do I succumb to this latest version of writer’s block?

If I succumb, I don’t have to ever worry about missing a deadline again. But, by the same token, I will never know the joy of hearing someone say they enjoyed my work again, or it made them feel better for a little while, or even that they agree with me and I made a slight difference somewhere.

I I can overcome, I will have satisfaction in knowing that I’ve still got it – the drive and the talent.

Hopefully, I can sort it out this month. I guess it boils down to this: If I post a blog next month, I overcame. If I don’t – I succumbed. I’m actually leaning toward overcoming, but we’ll see.

In the meantime, I’ll get my manuscripts todgether and look at what I have already written. Maybe that will inspire me to continue. Or one of my characters may whisper in my ear and get me going again. That has happened before, too.

Hopefully, I can gather my wits about me and continue. Life would be boring without the murder and mayhem my characters can get me caught up in.

While we’re all waiting to see which way the cookie crumbles, feel free to check out my eclectic selection of books on Amazon. There may be something there you have yet to read.

https://www.amazon.com/author/annwilmerlasky

Until next month, read and write to your heart’s content. Enjoy what respite you can find in your lives.

As always, I welcome your reactions and responses to any of my blogs. I love to hear from my readers. Also, here are links to my Twitter and Facebook accounts, if you care to share your thoughts with me there or look for my publication announcements:

https://twitter.com/awlasky

https://www.facebook.com/ann.wilmerlasky

It’s now August and the world is heating up. The A/C is working way too hard. Not much rain recently to bring us any relief from the drought. May be a good time to check out: “Global Warning: Climate in Crisis” available from Amazon:

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B08KWQ6SHK/

 

 

 

Will She or Won’t She?

 

July 2021 Blog

Insurmountable: A Haiku

I have hit that wall

Over which I cannot climb,

Yet I keep trying.

by Ann Wilmer-Lasky

 

Does that make me noble, hopeless or just plain stupid?  As July starts on a rainy note (It’s actually Monsoon Season), I’m vacillating between “hanging it up” or “hanging in there”.

I’m suffering from a really bad case of Writer’s Block. Except for the blog and my daily Haiku, I haven’t made any progress in more than two months.

Sam Rock is not pleased. He wants his new adventures with Marie Delacroix to be published and soon. The natives of Acqueria are anxious to get their early story out there also. And there’s always Eldreth lurking in the shadows wondering why his story isn’t finished.

My muse sits and sulks. She wants us to go outside and write, but we can’t. It’s been too hot (well over 100°F) for most of the month or (lately) raining day and night. She says it’s no excuse, but she knows my inside voice is hampered by the slightest distractions.

And there are plenty of those: the computer, the TV and all the housework and organizing  that screams to be done.

It would be so easy to just hang it up and not make the effort, but I’m not sure the other stuff would get done anyway. And I certainly wouldn’t be any happier.

In fact, I’m happiest when I’m writing , so I guess I owe it to myself to keep at it. There’s always the chance my muse and I will connect, and the words will flow.

My not writing would not lead to a happy me.

This will be the shortest blog I have ever posted, but it’s a compromise with my muse. The alternative would be no blog at all this month, and I’ve posted faithfully since January 1, 2017. I don’t want to break my streak, Hoping for more and better news to report next month. Until then – keep the faith and keep well. Try to stay cool. That’s been difficult in our neck of the woods where the temperature having been north of 100 F° for a while now.

June has been brutal. July promises to be no less. Let’s hope August cools down, but I’m not holding my breath.

As always, I welcome your reactions and responses to any of my blogs. I love to hear from my readers. Also, here are links to my Twitter and Facebook accounts, if you care to share your thoughts with me there or look for my publication announcements:

https://twitter.com/awlasky

https://www.facebook.com/ann.wilmerlasky

Also, please feel free to visit me at my Amazon Author Page:

https://www.amazon.com/author/annwilmerlasky

 

 

 

 

Near Normal

April 2019 Blog

Functioning? Yes – barely. Near normal? Never, ever.

Normal: A Haiku

by Ann Wilmer-Lasky

Such a relative

Term. Don’t think I’ve ever been

Anywhere near it.

I’ve been sick most of March. Got that one flu that the shot didn’t cover this year. Almost over it. Almost back to…

Yeah, right. I’ve never been normal. But I’m almost back to doing what I was doing when I got sick. Still sleep a lot, though. Seems when you get this old, it takes longer to recover.

Even my audio book release has been postponed another month. Seems my narrator has been down with it, too. Doesn’t do much for the voice.

So, let’s say March didn’t happen. We just went from February to April, lost a month and an hour’s time, and here we are. Taxes are due in two weeks and my manuscripts are still piled up.

Spent a lot of time editing the first half of “The Chronicles of Acqueria: The Early Years.” Now all I have to do is write about 35,000 more words. Should crank that out in about a month, right? We’ll see about that.

Then I’m still rethinking the second Sam Rock novel. With the new ideas, it will be a much stronger, more dramatic story.

The “Global Warning” chapbook is still sitting there – waiting for me to gather, embellish and expand. Should wax magnificent in some summer’s night dream. (Can you tell I’m on medication?)

Have a lot of housework to catch up on, too. Being sick just sends everything to the back burner where it just sits and simmers and sputters out.

When I look at it as a whole, it’s just overwhelming. So I guess I’ll just have to take the wise advice I read somewhere a long time ago in a galaxy... When asked how do you eat an elephant, the reply was –  one bite at a time. Although at my advanced age, I’d probably best take bigger bites if I really want to finish the thing.

Also toying with the idea of doing  proofreading for hire (in my spare time). I’ve got a pretty good command of the English language, so I’d love to lend a hand out there to help others along their path to publication. (More on that later.)

For now,  I’ll content myself with diving back into the literal creation of Acqueria and enjoy my fantasy world for a while. The real world out there is not a friendly place anymore, and I’d love to spend much less time in it.

Hopefully, when I’m finished in Acqueria, the real world will right itself a bit and we will all be  the better for it. But I’m certainly not holding my breath until that happens.

This month’s blog may be shorter than usual, but I’ll make up for it in the pages of my manuscript, and there’s always next month.

I’m looking forward to May already.  So sad, the time goes so fast as it is.

I’ll drop more lines later. Right now I’m off to nap time and more medication. Seems like my normal routine anymore.

Nap time is over, and I’ve dreamt up nothing new to say. So, I’ll end this with my usual farewell invitation and solicitations.

Until next time, keep the faith. Keep writing and keep reading. Enjoy what other universes may make you happy. Perhaps someday, even this one will match up to our ideals, but I’m still not holding my breath.

Until that time, I welcome your reactions and responses to any of my blogs. I love to hear from my readers. Also, here are links to my Twitter and Facebook accounts, if you care to share your thoughts with me there:

https://twitter.com/awlasky

https://www.facebook.com/ann.wilmerlasky

I’m also including a link to my Amazon’s Author’s page. Feel free to visit me there also:

https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B003SH6HIQ

All of my books are available on Amazon.

April’s featured novel is my Young Adult fiction: “The Chronicles of Acqueria: Blood Moon Treachery”.  https://tinyurl.com/ydbhv3ae

This month’s featured poetry chapbook is again “The Castleweaver's Tales: A Dozen Glimpses of Medieval Madness: 25th Anniversary Edition”.  https://tinyurl.com/ybllonvw

The Darkening

May 2018 Blog

While I can see, I must be about finishing my manuscripts and publishing them. I can no longer look to the future.

The Darkening: A Haiku

Against ensuing

Blackness, I would enjoy what

Light I am allowed.

Life Sucks and then you die - and life still sucks - so says George in the series "Dead Like Me" and she knows.

The time to do my “to do” list has just been shortened considerably.

I’ve been wondering why everything seems so dark all the time.  Then I closed my right eye one day and saw only clouded images in my left. So I go to the doctor (after a few months). I have cataracts, right? Yep,  in both eyes actually. But that’s not the real problem. They are not worth operating on.

What the real problem is, is inoperable. I have Macular Degeneration. Something I thought only other people got. I didn’t realize it was an insidious, creeping condition that takes you unaware. The only thing that might halt or slow it down, seems to be a vitamin/mineral supplement concoction called A REDS-2, which I started taking on April 11^th, the day after my startling diagnosis. But it’s not a cure-all and I am going blind.

How soon? Don’t know.  Hopefully the retina specialist I’ve been referred to can tell me,  but he won’t be in town until May 24^th. (We have very limited resources here in the “UFO Capitol of the World”.)

In the meantime, while I can see (especially to format), I need to publish everything I can. Guess it’s also time to get those audio-books started. I’m going to be depending on those soon. My guess is, a lot of others enjoy them for the same reason.

I guess “through a glass, darkly,” will have different meaning for me now, as I assume everything will fade away to darkness.

I have added an additional task – that of studying Macular Degeneration to see what I can expect. I may even write about – if only to warn others out there that it does exist and you must do everything you can to protect yourself.

So far, I understand that one really does need to wear sunglasses, taking an A-Reds 2 supplement for the last few years (could) have helped, and the heavy doses of diuretics I take for my congestive heart failure condition probably hasn’t done my eyes any good.  I need to learn more.

On the writing front (after spending some time on self-pity) I have gotten back to writing. I’ll be finishing my Seasons of Sam Rock sequel soon.  I’ve also started formatting my next poetry chapbook, “Life’s Lemons and Lemonade: A Collection of Haiku: Volume Two: The Write Life”. Getting a good start on that should help with my subsequent releases, as I’ll only have to plug into the template. Sounds easy, doesn’t it?

My next novel release will be the sequel to Black Oak. I just have to polish the manuscript, format and publish as well. Okay, I have to find the files first. I swear they are here somewhere. Really, I have a hard copy in a file box somewhere, and I have computer files saved from my old dead computer. Honestly, all I have to do is track them down. They are somewhere on my new half-Terrabyte hard drive and one or the other of my one-Terrabyte external hard drives. My computer guys did so much copying and saving, I may have multiple copies.

Guess I really should straighten all that out. My Norton security scans says I have over 1 million files on each drive. But, it’s really hard for me to stare at the screen much anymore.

By-the way, computer people, do you know that those of us with compromised eyesight can’t see all your fancy color concoctions? Your clever pale blues and pinks and light greens and (especially) yellow just fade into the white background. Those fill-in boxes are getting harder and harder to see. And the browser geniuses don’t seem to offer a display option that would benefit such impairment.

So, now, I muddle along, enjoying the visions before me less and less. But, while I can see, I need (more than ever) to get my last month’s ducks in some kind of order.

I also need to teach my husband how to pay the bills. He hasn’t paid a bill in over 31 years of marriage. He’s definitely going to have to learn to compromise and juggle, as I have done all the years – managing, somehow, to keep a roof over our heads and the lights, heat and water on. Oh, joy, won’t that be fun?

In next month’s blog, I will journal my progress, both on the writing front and the vision front. As I end this month’s blog, let me share another Haiku – appropriate to the way I feel right now.

It is this: Some days it doesn’t pay to think; other days, it’s just too painful.

Timeout: A Haiku

I’ll not be thinking

Today; my brain is tired,

And it needs to rest.

Until next month, I welcome your reactions and responses to any of my blogs. I love to hear from my readers. Also, here are links to my Twitter and Facebook accounts, if you care to share your thoughts with me there:

https://twitter.com/awlasky

https://www.facebook.com/ann.wilmerlasky

This month, I’m including a link to my Amazon’s Author’s page. Feel free to visit me there also:

https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B003SH6HIQ

All of my books are available on Amazon.

May’s featured novel is my Middle Grade sci-fi offering: “The Aurora UFO Incident - A Novel” https://tinyurl.com/yb875xw4

This month’s featured poetry chapbook is again “Life's Lemons and Lemonade: A Collection of Haiku: Volume One: One for the Book” http://tinyurl.com/zuayqu8

Write Away

November 2017 Blog

Write Away

Today is the first day of the rest of my writing life.

Write Away: A Haiku

NaNoWriMo reigns

Supreme, demands I fulfill

Declared prophesy.

Today is November 1, 2017 – the first day of NaNoWriMo (National Novel Writing Month – https://nanowrimo.org) for this year. I will be participating for my seventh year in a row – at least. Could be longer, but that’s as far back as their records go.  Every November since 2011, I have penned at least 50,000 words, literally, since I still write with pen on paper.

I’ve written an odd assortment of novels, some finished and published – some not. Actually 50,000 words is not enough for a full-length novel. So I try to finish in December for NoNoFiMo (National Novel Finishing Month – http://nanofimo.net).

There has even been a NaNoEdMo (National Novel Editing Month) in March. Not certain that one still exists as my attempts to access it give me an unsecure site warning and tells me I do not exist.

Writing 50,000 words in 30 days requires at least 1,667 words a day to finish on the 30^th.  I try to finish by  November 28^th , which is my birthday. Kind of like a present to myself.

I find it requires a good two-and-a-half hours of dedicated writing to accomplish. I seldom split the time up, because I don’t want to lose my train of thought and have to go over what I’ve written. I reserve that for the first few minutes of my writing session.

I pretty much isolate myself as I don’t like distractions. For background noise, I listen to classical music. I can’t have regular TV on or any music with lyrics I can understand – my mind will start to wander.

I love the idea of getting lost in my story. I find it’s the best way to write. Also, it gives my characters the chance to jump in and maybe tell me something about themselves I didn’t know.

     I usually start with an abbreviated outline of where the story should go, But I have no problems taking it elsewhere, if my characters tell me it needs to go there.

The year I wrote “The Chronicles of Acqueria: Blood Moon Treachery”, my main character, Sentia told me she had a younger sister, Petra. The sister became an integral part of the story and is featured in the sequel on which I am still working.

My favorite novel so far has been “The Seasons of Sam Rock”, a 1940’s  Hollywood detective novel that does not follow the detective genre rules, but becomes a horror showcase. In this noir novel set in sunny Southern California, I commit two of the novelist’s cardinal sin by killing a little old lady and a cute little dog. The culprits? A murder of ravens, controlled (or not) by a red-headed French woman named Marie Delacroix whom Sam Rock does not find hard to look at.

My favorite heinous killing come from my Western novella, “Black Oak: Town of Joy”. It’s a woman on woman axe murder, and I smile every time I read it.

Okay, so by now, you know I’m an introverted psychopath who loves to write horror, although I also write in the science fiction and fantasy segments of genre fiction.

This year’s NaNoWriMo will be a sequel to the Black Oak novel. If I stay on schedule, I should be able to publish in late spring. Although, the best laid plans of mice, men and writers oft gang awry. We’ll see if I can stick to that schedule.

Actually, I might be able to better it, since a novella can be around 43,000 to 50,000 words, so I might be able to publish early spring.

I find myself looking forward more to NaNoWriMo than to the holidays. I ‘ve never been much of a holiday person (any holiday) but writing in November is something special I do for myself, and of course, I love sharing my work with my loyal readers.

I will do my best post excerpts from the day’s writing on Twitter, so my readers can see what I’m up to. Maybe a sentence or two. Maybe every couple of days. Wouldn’t want to give too much away.

In the meantime, I will keep writing and posting my daily Haiku on Twitter and on Facebook, and I will endeavor to publish my next collection of Haiku before the end of the year.

Hopefully, with my computer problem behind me, I will get back into some sort of routine and start the New Year on a more productive note. Yep, I’ve pretty much chalked this year up on the non-productive side. I don’t know where it went; it just went, and I know there’s no do-overs for time gone by. It’s just gone.

So, here’s to NaNoWriMo and here’s to my mascot for the month.

And here’s a big salute to the coming year – a year of frenzied productivity.

Now y’all, don’t laugh too hard. It is possible, you know.

Until next month, I welcome your reactions and responses to my current blog. I love to hear from my readers. Also, here are links to my Twitter and Facebook accounts, if you care to share your thoughts with me there:

https://twitter.com/awlasky

https://www.facebook.com/ann.wilmerlasky

Stagnation

October 2017 Blog

The year is now three-fourths over and I am dead in the water.

Stagnation: A Haiku

These feet, mired in the

Muddied waters of life, long

To dance on the air.

Stagnation: #WritersBlock and #LifeBlock

Only in forward movement is there life worth living. I should think on this more often. I’m certainly not living it.

It has been a year now since publishing my “Life's Lemons and Lemonade: A Collection of Haiku: Volume One: One for the Book” (http://tinyurl.com/zuayqu8).

I should have another novel out and at least two more Haiku collections. But I don’t.

And there’s no one to blame but me. I have fallen into the rut of living day to day and expecting there to be a tomorrow, even though I know there are no guarantees.

Maybe I’m thinking that if I keep living in expectation of tomorrow, it will always come. Now, I know I’m not that delusional, but it does lend a certain rationality to my behavior (or lack thereof).

Three-fourths of this year gone. One year since my last release date. An actual dead line staring me in the face, and a nap is the best thing each day I can look forward to. I need to find the energy or at least the fortitude to start cranking out some more works I’ve had in progress way too long.

There are three months left in the year.

I’d like to see the sequel to my paranormal western “Black Oak: Town of Joy” (http://tinyurl.com/hohuhce ) on the market.

The sequel is already written. All I have to do is the final edit, format it and hit publish.

I’d also like to see two more Haiku collections hit the market. They will take a little more work. I’ve got three subjects I’m currently gathering material for. One is on writing – hopefully with all kinds of helpful hints to overcome writer’s block or lend inspiration to writers who might need that extra boost I seem to constantly need.

The second one is about our Universe and this planet Earth that we are so badly using. It is to be called “Global Warning” and I hope it serves as such, although I fear it will be but another voice “crying-in-the-wilderness”.

Another is a collection of Haiku and other poetry to be called “Dark Horizons” – a compilation of the darker side of me, the side that is closer to Anne Sexton, Sylvia Plath and Virginia Woolf than even I care to admit.

Gee, talking about them almost makes me want to stop writing this and get to work on them, but then, I’ve left writing this blog to the last minute again, so I’d best keep at it. I would like to keep this year’s blog record intact. This will be my tenth month in a row to post it on time.

So I’ll keep writing this while I’m catching glimpses of the latest episode of the Ray Donovan show, which appears to be all about the right-to-die and/or assisted suicide.

I am surprised that they did this so openly. I don’t think it would have been possible to get it aired a few years ago – even on HBO. It is surely a topic that needs to be addressed. As morbid as it may seem, it is an important subject. Something that we need to legitimize along with all the other personal rights that should be a given by now. But these rights, it seems, we have to keep fighting for over and over again.

And while I’ve gotten off topic, why does the greatest nation on Earth still not have Universal Health Care?

Really, it’s one of those things I thought we’d have before I died, along with a woman’s right to choose, racial equality, and justice for all.

I guess some things will have to wait until my next incarnation.

Until then, I welcome your reactions and responses to my current rantings. I love to hear from my readers. Also, here are links to my Twitter and Facebook accounts, if you care to share your thoughts with me there:

https://twitter.com/awlasky

https://www.facebook.com/ann.wilmerlasky